Seagull Philosophy: When French Fries Become the Answer to Life

Apr. 30th, 2025

As the morning sun painted the waves with golden edges, two seagulls were engaged in a conversation that would soon become the stuff of avian philosophical legend. The fluffy seagull on the left ruffled his feathers, preened his tail with his beak, and finally broke the silence. "Dude, what's the point of all this? What are we even living for?"

Before he could even finish his existential query, the seagull on the right suddenly straightened up, flapped his wings wildly as if struck by lightning, and squawked at the top of his lungs, "To hit the docks and score some French fries!"

The answer was so unexpected that the fluffy seagull nearly toppled off the rock. He regained his balance and stared at his companion with an incredulous look. "Wait, I'm trying to have a deep conversation about the meaning of seagull life here! Look at us, soaring through the sky, overlooking the ocean—is. Isn't that romantic?"

"Romance doesn't fill your belly, though," the dull-eyed seagull tilted his head, revealing a few unruly feathers under his wing. "Remember when you chased that rainbow for three hours last month? You ended up slinking back here to fight me for a dried fish."

Stung by the truth, the fluffy seagull huffed in protest. "That's because... because I was seeking poetry and adventure!"

"Poetry and adventure?" The dull-eyed seagull got all worked up, flapping his wings so hard they made a racket. "Let me tell you about my discovery last week! I found half a bag of cold French fries in a human restaurant's trash can. The crunch, the saltiness—it was like a party in my beak! That's what I call the peak of seagull existence!" As he spoke, he started drooling, leaving a rather unpoetic puddle on the rock.

The fluffy seagull sneered. "You're getting excited about human garbage? We're the kings of the sky, the spirits of the ocean!"

"Kings still need to eat!" The dull-eyed seagull suddenly lowered his voice and leaned conspiratorially. "I overheard some humans talking on a fishing boat. They have this thing called 'working stiffs' who get up before dawn, work their tails off all day, just to get some paper with faces on it. Then they use that paper to buy food. Sounds familiar, doesn't it? Just like us hitting the docks for fries!"

These words left the fluffy seagull stunned. He'd never imagined his simple-minded, food-obsessed friend could come up with such profound insights. Before he could respond, the dull-eyed seagull was already taking off. "Stop overthinking! It hurts my tiny bird brain. Let’s go score some fries!"

Watching his friend fly away, the fluffy seagull hesitated for a moment but then followed suit. As the salty sea breeze ruffled his feathers, he realized that the pursuit of fries wasn't so silly after all. Maybe, in this vast world, everyone—even seagulls—is just looking for their own version of "French fries."

From that day on, "Let’s hit the docks for fries" became their secret code. Sometimes it was about survival, other times it was just for fun. More often than not, it was about finding that simple joy in the daily grind of flying and scavenging. After all, there may not be one right answer to the meaning of life. What matters is finding something that makes you feel fulfilled.

And for these two seagulls, nothing beats perching on a dock railing on a sunny afternoon, gobbling up the French fries that clumsy humans drop. Life's too short, so why not enjoy the fries while you can?